NewStats: 3,264,149 , 8,182,774 topics. Date: Monday, 09 June 2025 at 09:14 PM 1n5d4m

descarado:

Say you love them differently.

Love can never be equal.
You love your parents and wife deeply but differently not equally.

Is it your love...... I love my children equally.....


You can love yours differently, I love mine equally.......

Kobojunkie:
1. In what ways?

2. So, the parent is said not to love and cherish all the children equally, abi? or what else are you saying here.

3. Ah, I see! So, children with bad characters should be loved and cherished less than children whose characters you, the parent, perceive as good and fitting?

4. Children who are disrespectful to parents should be loved and cherished less, right?

And one would wonder why I insisted that only biological parents who are at least self-aware can truly love their children and do so equally.🙄🙄

Sad how some people have comprehension issue. I know what you are. I shouldn't have wasted my time educating you on this issue.

descarado:
✓ That's harsh and extreme.

It is also very common. Most parents I have met are blind to the way they treat their biological kids.😩

Danisaint112:
✓ Sad how some people have comprehension issue. I know what you are. I shouldn't have wasted my time educating you on this issue.

Your writeups clearly indicate that your belief is in the onus lying with the child to earn love and fair treatment from you, the parent, by way of respect and obedience towards you. Why take offense when your stance is repeated back to you? 🙄🙄

Kobojunkie:
Nature and your gods have nothing to do with what is clearly a human behavioral problem. I have seen foster parents — non-biological parents, by the way— capable of loving their children equally. However, I have yet to meet biological parents who can do the same. It is weird.

You don't know what you're talking about.
So long as we are human. There's no way you can love two persons equally. Take it or leave it.

It may look to you as if you love them equally, at one point in life, you'll notice that there's one you have greater affinity for them the other. Sometimes, there may not even be any reason you can figure out why this special love. Other times, it may be cos of that child's better behaviors.

My point is that human beings lack the power to love multiple people the same way.

Psoul:
➜You don't know what you're talking about. So long as we are human. There's no way you can love two persons equally. Take it or leave it.
➜ It may look to you as if you love them equally, at one point in life, you'll notice that there's one you have greater affinity for them the other. Sometimes, there may not even be any reason you can figure out why this special love. Other times, it may be cos of that child's better behaviors.
➜ My point is that human beings lack the power to love multiple people the same way.

1. You may choose to believe that but I am more interested in proof of your claims. What proof do you have of this claim of yours?

2. It seems to me that this here depends on your particular definition of this love you have towards these different people. I know for a fact that it is possible for individuals to love others equally. And this usually involves making love less of an emotional response and more of a logic-driven response to others. Emotionally intelligent people, less ruled by emotions, tend to be able to do well in this.

3. I totally disagree.

Kobojunkie:
1. You may choose to believe that but I am more interested in proof of your claims. What proof do you have of this claim of yours?

2. It seems to me that this here depends on your particular definition of this love you have towards these different people. I know for a fact that it is possible for individuals to love others equally. And this usually involves making love less of an emotional response and more of a logic-driven response to others. Emotionally intelligent people, less ruled by emotions, tend to be able to do well in this.

3. I totally disagree.

Oga, let me still tell you once again that you don't know what you are talking about.
Love based solely on logic without emotion is only possible in theory.

Love solely on logic is just like choosing to love because you share same values, goals, or resources with such a person. It can also be that kind of love you have for someone because it is just right to love or because loving that person is beneficial to you. Or you feel morally obligated to do that. That is love based solely on principle rather than affection.

In any love where affection, desire, warmth, joy are missing, such relationship will better be described as Partnership, Companionship or Friendship with benefits
Without emotional depth, I will boldly tell you that it is not fully love, but perhaps loyalty, or responsibility.
Emotional elements help love grow, deepen, and endure.

Then, in a family where you have your children and children, please tell me how you can practice love based solely on logic without some elements of emotion?
That home will look too serious and official. I can not thrive in such a rigid environment.
It will look like a kind of Boss-Surbodinate official relationship.

So among your children, there must be the one you feel more attached to.
There must be that one that tends to show you more empathy
There must be the one that his/her presence lightens everywhere and bring lots of joy.
My brother, in such environment, it will be impossible to love all of them equally.
It will also be impossible to practice your so called "logical love."

Psoul:
➜Oga, let me still tell you once again that you don't know what you are talking about. Love based solely on logic without emotion is only possible in theory.
➜ Love solely on logic is just like choosing to love because you share same values, goals, or resources with such a person. It can also be that kind of love you have for someone because it is just right to love or because loving that person is beneficial to you. Or you feel morally obligated to do that. That is love based solely on principle rather than affection. In any love where affection, desire, warmth, joy are missing, such relationship will better be described as Partnership, Companionship or Friendship with benefits
➜ Without emotional depth, I will boldly tell you that it is not fully love, but perhaps loyalty, or responsibility.
➜ Emotional elements help love grow, deepen, and endure.
➜ Then, in a family where you have your children and children, please tell me how you can practice love based solely on logic without some elements of emotion? That home will look too serious and official. I can not thrive in such a rigid environment. It will look like a kind of Boss-Surbodinate official relationship.
➜ So among your children, there must be the one you feel more attached to. There must be that one that tends to show you more empathy
There must be the one that his/her presence lightens everywhere and bring lots of joy. My brother, in such environment, it will be impossible to love all of them equally. It will also be impossible to practice your so called "logical love."

1. I disagree! Humans are made of moods, and as a result, we switch from one emotional state to another every moment of our days or lives—emotions are fleeting. Making it utterly irrational to base any of our actions solely on our emotions. Rational love — a love based more on logic than on emotions is quite feasible. This type of love is tangible, measurable, and also more fairly and equally implementable across a large scale, unlike love that is based on emotions run on varying levels of neurotransmitters in one's brain and body at any given time.

2. Again, I disagree with you. Obligation/principle(sometimes the moral kind) pretty much drives every kind of love that exists out there. The question is whether that obligation is motivated by rational reasons or by a surge of hormones in one's brain, aka affection— the irrational kind of love.

Another advantage of logical love is that it allows one to freedom to love even when there are no shared values, resources, goals, expectations, etc., between the lover and the loved. .

3. What is love if there is no responsibility or loyalty towards the loved one? Again, I disagree with your assessment.

4. I don't believe emotions are designed to help anything grow. I believe instead they are designed to provide us with a measure of our internal and our environment. Growth and deepening of understanding, however, come from our smartness about our emotions and overall self-awareness and reflection. So, again, I disagree with this claim made by you.

5. So, yes, I disagree with this assertion of yours as well since you seem from it to think or believe that it is those driven only by emotions that can love, an obvious misconception, held by a majority of the religious.

6. Rational love ensures that you treat them all more fairly and equally, removing affection that is biased in every aspect of its form, from the decision making and acting out of one's love.

Kobojunkie:
1. I disagree! Humans are made of moods, and as a result, we switch from one emotional state to another every moment of our days or lives—emotions are fleeting. Making it utterly irrational to base any of our actions solely on our emotions. Rational love — a love based more on logic than on emotions is quite feasible. This type of love is tangible, measurable, and also more fairly and equally implementable across a large scale, unlike love that is based on emotions run on varying levels of neurotransmitters in one's brain and body at any given time.

2. Again, I disagree with you. Obligation/principle(sometimes the moral kind) pretty much drives every kind of love that exists out there. The question is whether that obligation is motivated by rational reasons or by a surge of hormones in one's brain, aka affection— the irrational kind of love.

Another advantage of logical love is that it allows one to freedom to love even when there are no shared values, resources, goals, expectations, etc., between the lover and the loved. .

3. What is love if there is no responsibility or loyalty towards the loved one? Again, I disagree with your assessment.

4. I don't believe emotions are designed to help anything grow. I believe instead they are designed to provide us with a measure of our internal and our environment. Growth and deepening of understanding, however, come from our smartness about our emotions and overall self-awareness and reflection. So, again, I disagree with this claim made by you.

5. So, yes, I disagree with this assertion of yours as well since you seem from it to think or believe that it is those driven only by emotions that can love, an obvious misconception, held by a majority of the religious.

6. Rational love ensures that you treat them all more fairly and equally, removing affection that is biased in every aspect of its form, from the decision making and acting out of one's love.

Theory that is practically impaired.
Imagination an ideal State.
Alice in wonderland.

Psoul:
➜ ;DTheory that is practically impaired. Imagination an ideal State. Alice in wonderland.

The only reason it seems theoretical to you is that you refuse to open your mind to its existence. For instance, people with high emotional intelligence — aware that emotions are more or less brain signals, not orders or instructions— understand that the mind has to be in charge of all of the decision making if they are to rationally navigate their internal and external environments. Many of these people I have personally observed chose to adopt for reasons best known to them, and they navigate their treatment of each child based on age, development, personality type, etc., rather than emotionally induced parameters. Children raised in this sort of setting are likely to develop better mentally, socially, and emotionally.

descarado:

You love deeply and differently but never equally.

As long as they are not the same and has diff temperaments, you will love them differently.

A mum will love her son who is a cultist though she detests cultist differently the way she will love her other son who is a pastor assuming she is very religious. Also the love you have for your son and daughter is never the same and equal.

eeyaa... do you havechildren already?

i totally disagree with your write up maybe for now..

i love my children equally and nothing can change that

Kobojunkie:
......Those parents who live in denial of this issue are usually the worst.

speak for yourself

CoronaVirusPro:


No one said you don’t love them. But you have one that is your favorite.

That one that when the mum spanks, it feels like they are spanking you. 🤣

believe me, the both of them. I have been pondering on this issue for long, believe me, i don't know later ooo, but for now, i love them equally.

Konection:
✓ speak for yourself

Most Nigerian parents are terrible parents yet if you ask them, they would almost always talk of how they suffered to raise their kids as though that alone is guarantee of their goodness as parents.

Konection:
➜speak for yourself

I am clearly speaking here of what I have observed, and many out there have confirmed as well.